Fourth Down Page 8

  Bravery was never one of my strengths.

  I moved my head slightly so his hand slipped out of my hair and onto his chest. Now I had to get my ass out of his firm grasp. When I tried to move, he mumbled something and gripped me tighter. Looking around I found a throw pillow on the back of the couch. As nimbly as I could I slipped out of his arms and replaced my body with the throw pillow. Ford hugged the pillow to his chest and rolled to his side. He looked so peaceful when he slept. I couldn’t see the turmoil in his eyes or the tension around his mouth that always seemed to be there.

  With a sigh I slipped on my boots and my coat. I really needed to be careful around him. When I was dating Aiden I thought I was in love, but now I knew I was nowhere close. I wasn’t saying I was in love with Ford, but I could be. If he showed even the slightest hint that he reciprocated my feelings, I could see myself falling hard.

  Quietly shutting the front door behind me, I walked home quickly in the cold November night. A few snowflakes landed in my hair. Just as I reached my apartment and went inside, my phone beeped. It was well after midnight. Who was texting me now?

  Ford: Where are you?

  Me: Home

  That was it - no follow up. He could be so weird and moody sometimes - most of the time. I got ready for bed, but it was a while before I fell back asleep. I missed the warm body I had been curled up against earlier. For the life of me I couldn’t remember how we got in that position, but it really didn’t matter.

  *****

  I slept late and got some homework done in the afternoon. Brooke came over when I was getting ready to go out with her. This was the night we planned to go to The Last Call to listen to the band whose guitar player she was lusting after. Because I was going to see Ford, I let Brooke help me with my outfit. She had to choose something from my closet, not hers, so I wasn’t too worried about looking like a hooker.

  After trying on several different combinations, I ended up in dark fitted jeans, a silky green see through blouse with a black cami underneath, and black heels. Brooke blew my hair dry and straightened it until it hung down my back smooth and glossy. I did my own makeup, but put on a little more than usual at Brooke’s direction.

  “You look smokin’ tonight!” Brooke exclaimed when she made me do a twirl for her final inspection.

  This was the first time I had let her dress me up and take me out without complaining. I actually felt pretty tonight, and I told myself that my rare excitement for a night out didn’t have anything to do with Ford. But that was a complete and total lie. It had everything to do with him. I just didn’t have any idea if he would even notice.

  Brooke loaned me a black leather jacket that looked great with my outfit and we headed out. It was freezing cold and flurrying, so Brooke drove us since I hadn’t fixed my car yet. The pub was already crowded when we arrived, but thankfully nothing like the last time I was here on Halloween. Stepping inside the door I brushed the snow off my hair and glanced toward the bar. I had mentioned to Ford that I would be here tonight. He would be working, but I hoped to be able to at least say hello to him.

  Ford was in the middle of mixing a drink, but his eyes were already on me when I looked over, like he was watching the door. It was slightly disconcerting, especially since his expression was less than friendly. Not that that was unusual for him, but over the last week he hadn’t turned his frowny face on me. Brooke directed me over to an open table close to where the band was setting up. I took a seat while she waltzed right up to the guitarist and turned on the charm. I had to admire her confidence.

  I risked another glance toward the bar and saw Ford say something to one of the servers. He looked back at me and nodded his head in the direction of the back hallway. Did he want me to follow him? My eyebrows pulled together in confusion. He sighed with a look of annoyance and stalked over to me, grabbed my wrist and pulled me with him down the hallway and into a back room. If he wanted to talk to me, he could have asked me like a civilized person. He didn’t have to drag me away like I was an errant child on my way to a time out.

  Shutting the door behind him he paced the floor in front of me. What was wrong with him?

  “Did you walk home last night?” He asked me with his back to me.

  “Yes,” I replied, still not understanding what this was about.

  Ford ran his hands through his hair, the action making his shirt stretch across his chest and shoulders. “Why didn’t you ask me to drive you home?” He demanded.

  “I…I didn’t want to wake you. You looked…so peaceful,” I stammered. His unexplained anger was throwing me off, and I didn’t like it. I thought after our talk in the coffee shop last week, we had come to an understanding and were past the point where he constantly yelled at me.

  “So, you just walked home in the middle of the night. By yourself. Do you know how unsafe that is?” His voice was slightly raised now, and I was finally beginning to understand why he was mad. He was worried about me. I almost had to giggle at his description of our small town as unsafe.

  “Ford, I was perfectly fine. It wasn’t that far, and…”

  He cut me off. “It doesn’t matter how far it was. You’re young and…beautiful. Do you have any idea what could have happened to you? You’re a really smart girl, but that was a fucking stupid thing to do.”

  At first his concern was endearing, especially when he said I was beautiful, but now he was just pissing me off by implying I couldn’t possibly take care of myself. Like I hadn’t managed to live twenty years without his protection.

  “Okay, Dad,” I snapped.

  Ford whirled around to face me, anger and something else flashing in his blue eyes. He walked toward me, the tension rolling off his body causing me to back up until I ran into the counter. He stopped right in front of me, so close his body was mere inches from mine. Even with my heels on, he was still quite a bit taller. He placed his hands on the counter on either side of my body, caging me in.

  Leaning down so we were eye to eye, his gaze intense, he growled, “My feelings for you, Poppy, are definitely not fatherly.”

  My breath caught in my throat as the meaning of his words sunk in. He moved his mouth closer to my ear, and my eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of his warm breath on my neck. His cheek touched mine, and I felt him inhale deeply.

  Then he was gone. Gone from in front of me. Gone from the room. The door slammed shut behind him, and I opened my eyes to an empty room. What the hell just happened here? I could have sworn he was going to kiss me, and when he didn’t I was left with a sinking feeling of disappointment.

  On shaky legs I returned to my table and Brook’s questions about where I had been. Normally I wouldn’t divulge such personal details, but I needed her perspective on the situation.

  “He totally wants you,” she declared after I described our encounter in the back room.

  “It seemed like maybe that’s what he was saying, but I don’t know. I mean, look at him,” I said, although I didn’t dare to actually look over in his direction.

  Brooke rolled her eyes and said, “Seriously, Poppy? Yes, he’s hotter than hell, but so are you. Do you know how many guys in here you could go home with if you wanted to? The drummer already asked me about you while you were gone.”

  The band started playing then, and Brooke turned her attention to Seth, the guitarist. I was left to stew over my non-relationship with Ford for the next two hours. He was so moody and intense, but he had shown me glimpses of his softer side. Both were equally appealing to me, which was surprising.

  When the band had played its last song and started packing up to go, Brooke informed me she was going home with Seth. No surprise there.

  “Do you want us to drop you off on our way?” She asked me. From the way they were already groping each other, there was no way I wanted to be trapped in a confined area with them, even for a few minutes.

  “No, thanks. I’ll just walk.”

  Brooke winked at me. “You should ask Ford to take you home. You
know he doesn’t want you walking alone.”

  Yeah, right. I was definitely not asking him for anything. All the progress we had made over the last week had been wiped away by his outburst earlier, and he was once again the unattainably hot, moody guy who made me nervous.

  As Brooke and Seth walked out I risked a glance towards the bar. Uh oh. Ford was watching me intently with a frown on his face. I should have walked out with them, so he didn’t know I was going home alone. Instead I was stuck here with no escape unless I wanted him to chase me down. So like the coward I was, I scurried to the bathroom.

  I stayed in the stall for a ridiculously long time, hoping he would be involved with a customer when I snuck out. Finally I walked out of the bathroom - right into Ford’s rock hard chest. He held my upper arms to steady me.

  I batted his hands away. “Jesus, Ford. It’s kind of creepy to loiter outside the ladies room.”

  He leaned back against the wall and folded his arms across his chest. “I’m not loitering, Poppy. I’m waiting to talk to you.”

  I leaned against the opposite wall of the hallway and mirrored his position, crossing my arms over my chest. Maybe he would give me some clue into his behavior.

  He exhaled, “I’m sorry if I scared you earlier. I was just pissed off that you didn’t ask me for a ride. I thought we were friends...and I was worried about you.”

  “You didn’t scare me, Ford. You’re just so moody and…confusing.”

  He ran one hand through his hair, leaving it messy and sticking up. “I saw Brooke leave with Seth. Did you drive here?” Clearly he was not going to explain his earlier behavior.

  “No, my battery is dead, remember?”

  “I stopped by and fixed it this morning. It should be fine now,” he said. He fixed my car? Before I could process that he continued.

  “I think we both know I’m not going to let you walk home. Go sit at the bar and wait for me. I have about twenty minutes of clean up, and then I can drive you home.”

  I could have argued, but I knew it was futile. “Fine,” I huffed and stormed off to sit at the far end of the bar. His low chuckle followed me as I went.

  With my elbows on the bar and my chin propped up in my hands, I spent the next twenty minutes sipping the water Ford had set in front of me and watching him clean up the bar and close out tabs. The band had cleared out, and there were just a few stragglers left.

  Ford was at the other end of the bar with his back to me when a rather large man sat down on the bar stool next to me. He was probably in his forties, although his greasy thinning hair and lack of teeth might have made him look older than he really was.

  He waved his empty beer bottle in the air and yelled, “Walsh! I need another one.”

  Eww. Judging by the alcohol wafting from his pores, I would say he’d already had a few too many. Ford turned around and the corner of his mouth twitched up when he saw me wrinkling my nose and leaning away as much as I could without falling off my stool.

  Ford slung the towel he had been using to dry glasses over his shoulder and ambled over to this end of the bar.

  “Last call was fifteen minutes ago, Bill. You’re out of luck,” Ford said, resting his hands on his side of the bar.

  Bill’s face turned an unusual shade of red and he spit as he cursed at Ford, “You get me my goddamned beer right now. That’s your job now, Walsh. You’re not a hotshot ball player anymore. You’re just a washed up has been who needs to get me a beer when I ask for one.”

  Ford narrowed his eyes, but didn’t respond. I got the feeling that this was a fairly routine exchange between him and Bill. He turned away and started ringing up something on the cash register, but I could see the tension in his shoulders.

  There were very few times in my life that I had not been “too nice”. I had trouble sticking up for myself, let alone someone else, but watching Ford get bullied by some oversized, toothless drunk pushed me over the edge. This was apparently going to be one of those times when I spoke up.

  “Hey!” I said harshly to Bill, who didn’t even seem to hear me. Frowning, I poked his meaty arm with my finger until he looked at me. “You cannot talk to people like that,” I said waving my finger in his face. “What has he ever done to you? You’re just jealous that he is a great person, and you can barely hoist yourself onto the bar stool without being out of breath. You should apologize to Ford.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest and stared Bill down. His glassy eyes looked at me in astonishment before he turned back to Ford, who was watching me with surprised amusement.

  “You better put a muzzle on your bitch, Walsh. Or I’m going to shut her up myself.”

  My mouth dropped open in shock at being called a bitch, and before I could give Bill another earful, Ford reached over the bar and grabbed Bill by the collar of his plaid flannel shirt. Bill had to have weighed a good fifty pounds more than Ford, although none of it was muscle.

  In a split-second Ford yanked Bill halfway over the bar and snarled in his face, “You can sling all the shit you want at me, but don’t you ever talk to her like that.” He gave Bill a harsh shake and said in a low voice that couldn’t be argued with, “Apologize to the lady.”

  Bill croaked out something that sounded like “Sorry”. Then Ford shoved him back over the bar, and good old Bill landed ass first on the floor with a thud, knocking over bar stools on his way.

  I couldn’t do anything other than sit there looking back and forth between Ford, who was angrier than I’d ever seen him, and Bill, who looked like he had fallen and couldn’t get up.

  “Take your girl home, Ford. I’ll handle Bill.” This came from one of the waitresses, a tall bleached blonde who was probably close to forty but dressed like she was twenty.

  Ford glanced at me, and I could see him take a deep breath in an obvious effort to calm down.

  “Thanks, Shelly.”

  He tossed his towel on the bar and came around the end of the bar to help me off the bar stool. I reached for my jacket, but he got there first and held it out for me. When we left, he took my hand and led me down the back hallway and out the back door into the parking lot.

  It was still snowing lightly, and we didn’t speak as Ford held the passenger door to his truck open and closed it after I got in. I buckled my seatbelt and waited for Ford to come around and get in the drivers’ side…but he didn’t. Turning in my seat, I saw him pacing back and forth behind his truck. What was he doing?

  Unbuckling my seat belt I scrambled off my seat, and teetered on my heels through the gravel to the back of the truck.

  “What are you doing? It’s snowing and you’re not wearing a coat.”

  He scoffed and shook his head. Putting his hands on the tailgate and leaning over, he mumbled, “I have no fucking idea what I’m doing.”

  Taking a tentative step closer, I sat on the bumper next to him. “What’s wrong, Ford?” I asked quietly.

  He turned his head to look at me, and I was struck by the swirl of emotions in his blue eyes. Usually there was only anger with a hint of sadness, but now there was confusion, indecision and …desire? I recognized it as the same look that had flashed in his eyes earlier in the back room. Desire for me? My chest began to rise and fall a little quicker as he held my gaze.

  Looking away, he said, “Christ, Poppy. Don’t look at me like that.”

  My eyes immediately dropped to the ground in front of me. “Like what?”

  “Like you want me to kiss you…because that’s not a good idea.”

  Oh, God. Not only did he read my mind, but he rejected me in the same sentence. I could feel my cheeks heating with embarrassment, and I turned my head away so he couldn’t see the tears threatening to fall.

  “That’s not what I was thinking,” I lied. “But it’s good to know where you stand.” Obviously I had misunderstood his meaning earlier when he said his feelings for me weren’t fatherly and the look in his eyes just now.

  “Can you just take me home, please?” I mumbled, sni
ffling just a little.

  With my hand on his truck for balance in my heels, I made it around the side of the truck before Ford took my hand and turned me back to face him.

  “Are you crying?”

  Sniffling again, I blinked back a couple of tears. “No.”

  Still holding my hand, he placed his other on my chin, raising my face up to his. “Why are you crying, Poppy?”

  Turning my head away from his piercing eyes, I snapped, “Don’t be nice to me, Ford. Just take me home, and I won’t bother you anymore.”

  “Hey. You’re not bothering me…I mean you are, but not in the way you think.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest and scowled at him. “Shut up, Ford! I get it, okay. You don’t want to have to take care of me, and you certainly don’t want to kiss me. So, I’ll be sure to …”

  His hands landed on my shoulders, and he bent down so we were eye to eye again, just like earlier in the back room.

  “Wait. You think I don’t want to kiss you? That’s why you’re upset?”

  He released me and turned around, shoving his hands through his hair again and looking up to the sky. I didn’t say anything; I couldn’t. My well of words had dried up for the evening.

  Ford fisted his hands in his hair and then suddenly spun back around, stepping right up in front of me so our bodies were mere centimeters away from touching. I was already against the side of the truck, so there was nowhere to go. One of his hands wrapped around my waist to the small of my back, while the other resumed its position on my chin, forcing me to look up at him.

  His blue eyes were blazing, all trace of confusion and indecision gone, and when he spoke his voice was low and rough.

  “Make no mistake. I want to kiss you. I’ve wanted to kiss you from the moment you walked into the bar in that ridiculous schoolgirl costume. Even when I was pissed at you for helping my mom, I wanted to kiss you. And tonight, when you defended my honor to a guy three times your size, I wanted to kiss you. There is not a second that goes by when I’m around you that I don’t want to grab you and kiss the hell out of you, Poppy.”